City On A Hill

Porn is Bad

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Pornography is a widespread epidemic that has exploded since the internet has come on the scene. Internet pornography sales are at $4.9 billion, which is more than the NFL, NBA, MLB, and NHL sales combined. Women are one of the fastest growing demographics of pornography consumers.

1 out of every 3 visitors to porn sites are women. Sadly adolescents are the fastest growing demographic. 90% of 8-16 year olds have viewed porn online (most while doing homework). Worst of all the church is not left unaffected.

47% of Christians say pornography is a problem in their homes.

Personally the affects of porn are egregious.
The laundry list of sins that porn fall into is long.
Here are just a few.
· Lust - Matthew 5:27-28
· Adultery - Matthew 5:27-28
· Idolatry - Romans 1:24-25
· Slavery - 1 Corinthians 6:12-13 & 18
· Physical Effects - Looking at porn releases the same endorphins that smiling does. It has been shown that these endorphins can be as addictive as heroin or cocaine. These leaves the persons mind a slave to their body.
· Covetousness - Exodus 20:17

The laundry list of the consequences are even longer.
Porn causes:
· Disconnection
· Distances
· Dehumanization
· Sleep Deprivation
· Unhealthy Expectations
· Depression
· Guilt
· Unrealistic Fantasies
· Steals

For the Christian there is a war within us as Christ has given us a new heart, but our flesh still desires to do evil.

Romans 7:13-25
13 Did that which is good, then, bring death to me? By no means! It was sin, producing death in me through what is good, in order that sin might be shown to be sin, and through the commandment might become sinful beyond measure. 14 For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. 15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. 17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. 22 For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, 23 but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. 24 Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.

Jesus Saves
But we are not left to the control of our sexual desires. God has saved us through His son Jesus Christ.

RADICAL - We are saved from porn by having a greater pleasure in Jesus.

John 14:15-21
15 “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. 16 And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, 17 even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.
18 “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. 19 Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. 20 In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. 21 Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.”

We are not saved from porn by being holier, by putting up more barriers in our life, or by doing penance. We are only saved pouring our desires into Jesus, and we can't even do that in our own strength. Jesus says that He will send us the Holy Spirit who will increase our love for Him.

With this in mind we are called to:
Men
Pour all of your sexual desire towards Jesus.

Women
Find your personal worth in Jesus and not your image.

Couples
Husbands
Pour all of your sexual desire towards your wife and Jesus.

Wives
Be available for your husband to drink you up.

RELATIONAL - We are saved from porn by being connected to the people of God.

James 5:13-18
13 Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. 14 Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16 Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. 17 Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. 18 Then he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth bore its fruit.

God brings healing to His people through community. James in this passage beautifully assumes that his audience is living in community with each other. Unfortunately the same can't be assumed of our people today. There is the thought that we are ok as long as we go to a church service once a week. We have a disconnection with the people of God.

At City on a Hill we desire for our people to be in deep relationships with each other so God can use us as instruments of healing for each other. We do this through our Neighborhoods. If you are not living in community with brothers and sister in Christ you are missing out on everything that God has available for you.

Parents
As parents we have a great responsibility to raise our children up with a greater desire for Jesus than for porn. Some of us are in denial about whether or not our kids are caught up in porn. Here are some warning signs from theporntalk.com to see if your kid is into porn.

Your child is spending large amounts of time online, especially at night. This is kind of a basic one but it is a clear warning sign. If they are spending a ton of time in chat rooms or instant messaging or surfing the web, this may not be a good thing. Your child turns the computer monitor off or quickly changes the screen on the monitor when you come into the room. If they try to hide what is on the screen then surely it is something that they don’t want you to see. Hmmm. Could it be porn? Good chance it might be. Your teen locks the door when working on the computer. Okay, let’s consider why the door might be locked. It’s probably not so you won’t catch them diligently studying for the Algebra quiz You catch your child lying about computer use. Honest dialogue happens when there is nothing to hide. Lies are told to you when your child feels like you may not approve of their actions. If your child is being dishonest about computer use you need to address this.

If your child becomes isolated or depressed and withdraws from normal family functions. If a child abandons typical things that would bring them joy and withdraws into the cyber world, this must be addressed. You find pornography on your child’s computer. This is sort of a no-brainer but many parents will try and dismiss this. If you find pornography or inappropriate material on the computer it’s time to talk. When you check sites your child has visited, they are all erased. Covering your tracks is a clear indicator that the actions online were not appropriate. The erasing of history is a serious indicator. Make sure that history is checked often and that there are no weird patterns.

Listen to how your child or teen talks about members of the opposite sex. Do they have a healthy point of view? Are they expressing respectful comments or do they talk about guys or girls in a purely physical and sexual way. Porn removes respect and distorts a healthy perspective on relationships.

Every parent needs to talk to their kid about porn. With 90% of 8-16 year olds having been exposed to porn, you child is not left untouched. If they haven't seen it, their friends have. Please check out theporntalk.com for more information on having a talk with your kid.

RELEVANT - We are saved from porn by preaching the gospel to those in its snare.

1 Corinthians 5:9-13
9 I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— 10 not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. 11 But now I am writing to you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he is guilty of sexual immorality or greed, or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler—not even to eat with such a one. 12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? 13 God judges those outside. “Purge the evil person from among you.”

We are called to be in the world and to preach the gospel to everyone no matter what their sin is. We can no longer look at those that are caught up in sexual sin as "untouchable." We must show them the light of Jesus Christ.

Questions:
· What things do you turn to find pleasure in other than Jesus?

Husbands:
· How are you striving to make your wife your standard of beauty?
· What things are stealing your sexual desires from your wife?

Wives:
· What ways do you make yourself available to recieve your husbands sexual desires?
· What ways can you encourage your husband to stay pure in a world that is flooded with sexual perversion?

· When was the last time that you were open about your sins and asked for prayer?
· What sins do you need to confess right now and ask prayer for?
· Who is it a righteous person that you can turn to for prayer?

· Who is God calling you to share His light with?
· Who do you consider untouchable by God?
· What areas of the world have you been hiding from by living in a Christian bubble?

Resources:
Porn Again Christian A Frank Discussion on Pornography & Masturbation for God’s Men by Pastor Mark Driscoll
Death by Love - Mark Driscoll
theporntalk.com

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